Marriages...

So I have been on this soapbox for a while... you know... marriages. This past weekend Karnell and I went to a marriage training seminar. Before too many thoughts start running through your head, it was for work. I recently got "promoted" at work to where I teach relationship and marital classes for new or expectant parents that come through the Center. Well, one correct... I don't just teach them, Karnell, my husband teaches them with me.

So I heard of some very interesting, and sometimes disturbing information in regards to marriage. So I thought how appropriate to share what I learned with you... my ciber audience! I am more than likely going to have a small series of blogs, so, I hope that I get good feedback! I want you all to be a part!

I will share statistics, and other interesting facts! I'm going to start chronologically... meaning... single, dating, engaged, married, divored, and we will even touch on remarriage. Now, for the record, this is just what I've learned and have been trained in by Forest Institute here in Springfield. Most things I've experienced in some shape, form or fashion. One thing that I don't know from experience is remarriage... I've only been married to Karnell. Ok, let the ride begin!

The statistics: In 1930 84% of couples were married, in 1990 it was 56%, in 2005 it was 49.7%. The probability for divorce in blacks 70%, whites 47%, high school drop outs 60%, college graduate 36%, under 21 years of age 60%, over 21 years of age 40% In an Oklahoma Statewide survey...the reasons divorce happened: lack of commitment 84.9%, too much arguing 59.2%, infidelity 57.5%, married too young 42.9%, little to no marriage prep 41.4%, economic hardship 38.9%, domestic violence 30.1%, religious differences 20.6%.

So there you have it folks... these are just the statistics. This is good stuff, so you don't want to miss out! Have a great day!

Arguments...

What is the point of arguing? What does it prove? Is there a point that is "suppose" to be made? One thing that I have discovered is that I hate...utterly hate arguing. The thing that I hate to admit is that if you are married, arguing is the inevitable. Nobody told me that was apart of the "package" of getting married.

It is amazing what you will find yourself arguing over...typically it's something that doesn't have substantial value. Meaning one or two weeks from the argument, it will become irrelevant. The main reason an argument happens is because and expectation didn't happen. Whether it was communication, misinformed, hurt feelings, disrespect...the list could go on and on.

I do believe that there is a such thing as a healthy argument. Meaning something positive was accomplished...some type of ground was covered. And by the way, the whole saying to "agree to disagree" is a bunch of bull in marriage. Someone always wants to "win". They want to make sure that their point of view was seen, heard and understood. Not only that, but they want to know that you are going to change. It is almost like it's a demand.

So, if you can't avoid an argument, and they are apart of marriage...is there a way to argue in marriage?

When I argue...I get beyond upset, and it takes me a very long time to "cool" down. Maybe not the best way to handle an argument...but nevertheless, that's how I am. If I should be different, or whatever, please let me know. When I say a long time, it can take a couple of days...

So, for all those reading... what are your thoughts about arguments?

Food, Fun, Friends, and Babies!

So this past weekend I helped to host a baby shower! It was such a blast. Being around friends, is always a fun time. Especially when you have the group of friends that I do! When you have good friends, you better hold on to them tight!

I made a diaper cake for the first time...I think it turned out rather nicely! Overall the baby shower was a huge success! So, here are some pics of the very beautiful day! Enjoy!

Things are looking up!

If you know me at all, you know that I have this "man" figure in my life...called a husband. The reason I say "man" figure is because for our whole marriage, we really haven't had time to really enjoy being married, because he always worked.

When I first met Karnell, he worked at Cheddar's in Springfield, he had a constistant schedule--but still very rough hours. The consistency really helped us, or I think it would be safe to say that we probably wouldn't be together...

Once we moved to KC, he got his first management position at McDonalds. That was a shocker because his schedule was not consistant and he worked every possible hour that was available in a day. Not so bad because we were engaged; I was living with my mom, working and planning a wedding, so I didn't have a lot of free time to begin with.

A few months before we got married, he moved to Jack Stack BBQ where he was the back of the house manager. Better pay...horrible hours! The better pay cushioned the blow of not seeing him. He only got Thanksgiving and Christmas off, anything else he had to request it off, and still was no guarantee that he would get it. He worked there a little over a year.

Next in line after that was Panera. Again, better pay...much better pay and now we were looking a decent hours. Things started to smooth out! We were able to see each other, get ahead on bills...the whole nine. Then we moved back to Springfield...

He went back to Cheddar's (also better pay) because there were no positions at Panera at the time. So back to working horrific hours. I would like to say that I hated it with a passion. I was lonely...all the time. Karnell finally said, enough is enough. And decided to try for Panera again...it worked!

Karnell has been at Panera for a month now...and loving every moment of it! Not to mention...better pay! Karnell has had his weekends off for 4 weeks in a row! That hasn't happened in the history of us knowing each other! He only works late 2 nights a week, and we've had a blast. I've had more fun with Karnell these past four week than I've ever had...take that back, the most fun I've had with him was on our honeymoon--that was a whole week of vacation, and no job to go to at all (for the both of us)!

I can officially say, I'm lovin' it! Things are looking up...once again.

Disturbed...

Ok, so I have totally found a new passion. It is one that I didn't know existed. My new passion is pregnant teens. So for about a month I have been working for Pregnancy Care Center here in Springfield. I have been exposed to more than the average Joe has seen. To be honest, I'm seriously disturbed. Without disclosing any personal information (to protect the girls I know) I will give you a brief over view of what I've personally seen. There have been girls that are 11 years old and pregnant come to the center!!! Some of these girls come from very bad situations, while others said that they were bored... If you are that bored and you feel that sex is your ONLY alternative... all I can say is wow!

Not only that, but this week has been the first full week that I've been able to teach in the schools. I am teaching 6th graders...6th graders that can't read or write! Are you kidding me?!! So, you can only imagine how difficult it is to teach abstinence when they can't read or write. I am spelling words left and right for these little kiddos.

So most of you know that the alternative to Pregnancy Care Center is Planned Parenthood. For those that are a little naive, Planned Parenthood supports abortions. In a Planned Parenthood agency in Kansas City, it isn't UNCOMMON for a girl to go into the clinic more than 6 times for an abortion!!!!!! Not only that, but the boyfriend is typically paying for all of them!

Is anyone out there seriously disturbed by these statistics?! I would admit, that I have lived a sheltered life; and I new that abortions and young mom's was an issue, but give me a break. Having multiple abortions and being 11 years old, pregnant and can't read or write...that's an issue.

This will be my soapbox for awhile, so get ready for a pretty intense ride. This makes me beyond angry. Stay tuned...

Things are looking up!

This has been such a great week for me...things are truly starting to look up. For those that might not have known, I no longer work for Second Baptist; I work for Pregnancy Care Center. I will be teaching abstinence to 6th graders. Well, it's not only abstinence, it's about making the right decision when certain choices come your way. It's really about decision making...even though in one chapter it is solely devoted to sex. This is a 6 day cirriculum, and I am going into all the 6th grade classrooms in Springfield; which is about 22-24 classes! So it's very obvious that I will become very busy, very soon. I go to my first classroom on this coming Monday, it's at Study Elementary. I'm very excited...yet very nervous! I can't wait.

Another peice of good news is that Karnell finally got the job at Panera!!!!! We are so excited. We've been waiting to hear something back from them for about a month now... Just when we decided to go ahead and forget them, they call the next day to offer him the job! This is great news! I'm so proud of him. For those of you that know me and Karnell very well, you know that we haven't been able to see each other and spend good quality time together our whole relationship. So you can imagine what this will do for our marriage! Karnell has worked crazy hours from us dating up to now. I'm use to him being away, and me doing my own thing. I know that this will be a transition; I just pray that all goes smoothly. I'm optimistic!

I just thought all reading my blog should know what's the latest scoop in the Robinson's world! Hey, I've got to keep you in the loop! See ya!

What a great rest of the week!

For the first time in a long time, I was pretty busy this weekend! It was great! As many of you know, my sister came to visit me. I was so glad to see her. I absolutely love hanging out with her. She is not only my sister, but also a very good friend! I love you Ashley. We talked and laughed, something I haven't done in a really long time. It was quite refreshing. That was Wednesday.

On Thursday, Karnell and I had a date night. It was great, we went out for dinner, and then he took me shopping! I haven't been shopping in a very long time. I usually buy things for the house, like food and household supplies. I never buy anything for myself. We typically don't have the money, so it was such an unexpected treat. Guess what I bought, scented oil from Bath and Body Works...that's all, nothing else. How pitiful. Being a girl, you would think that shopping was something that came naturally, but I haven't done it in so long, that now I feel guilty to purchase anything for myself. I really need to get over that!

Friday night Karnell and his band named "Stretch" played at Mille's Cafe. They sounded really great. I was really impressed. I'm so proud of him. He is such a talented musician, and writer. Sometime's I'm amazed at how talented he really is. He's awesome!

Saturday I ran errands all day, and on Sunday Karnell and I went to a Cardinals game. They lost but, it was so much fun! Once the game was over, we started walking back to our car. Karnell reached to grab and hold my hand, just at that moment I shouted "oooohhhhhh, MONEY"!!! I ran to the middle of the street to grab a $1 bill, and to my surprise, there was a $5 bill tucked in there!. So I gained $6 bucks...not a bad ending to a great weekend!

I will post pictures of the festivities a little later! Bye