Too much goin on!

I know, I know... I haven't blogged in forever! Well, when you don't have easy access to the internet, it is easy to not blog so that you can take care of other important matters (like facebooking). At any rate, it is easier for me to possibly blog because I got a new laptop... I still don't have the internet at my house, but I can go to any wifi spot and all's well!

Well, just to recap, I got a job as an pre-k teacher for a private preschool back in January. I enjoy it for the most part, it has it's ups and downs, but what job doesn't!

I also started grad school just this past week! I am very nervous, but also excited. I am getting my master's in counseling and going on to get my doctorate in clinical psychology. So overall, I want to be a Pyschologist with my own private practice.

This summer I went on a vacation to Colorado Springs, CO. That was amazing! I had a great time. I climbed Pikes peak, and I got to see the top! I went white water rafting as well. We camped in tents, it was a great time. The mountains are beautiful and I can't wait to go back next year!

Well, I have to get back to studying, but hopefully this will not be the last of the blogging!

WOW!

Ok, so I haven't updated my blog in FOREVER! Yikes! I really need to take the time and update. We got the internet turned off at our house so I don't get to use the computer as much as I would like to. I am trying to buy a laptop so that I can go to places that have free wifi.. Because I don't get paid as much at this job, we had to cut back on a lot of extra expenses and internet was one that had to go. I will try to update a little more often. Well, my lunch is over... i will try to blog tomorrow... we'll see!

Just venting...

Ok, I just want to vent for a little bit. Nothing more. I just don't understand some things. I have had unique oportunities in life. I can't explain them all, but I've had rare possibilities and chances to meet some amazing, influencial and powerful people. These particular people not to mention have money.

Now, i know that money isn't everything, but it sure helps.

All I've ever wanted to do is open my own private preschool. I was bound and determined to open one once I got enough experience. So right out of college I was an assistant director of a private preschool. I lost that job, and as a result I haven't been able to bounce back and regain my focus.

To be honest, I feel as though I will never reach that goal because I'm married now, and I have to be a wife...which means Karnell has the final say. So my dreams have to be put on hold in order to keep peace in the home.

I guess my question is, to all married women: How do you pursue your dreams and goals and still be submissive to your husband. I am having a ridiculously hard time balancing the two.

I want to open my own school so bad that I'm ALMOST willing to risk things that shouldn't be at risk. I feel smothered. I feel trapped. I feel that success can only come to me as of a result of Karnell experiencing success first.

Don't be misinformed. I love my husband and I love my family, but I want more and I can't because Karnell as other dreams and plans. I know, we've had this discussion before and it always ends up in a huge argument...

I just want balance. I'm losing who I am and I don't like it.

Now I can breathe easy!

Ok, last time I wrote... I was all stressed out over license plate stuff and vacationing. Well, I just want to let you know that I was able to pay everything for my tags and we went to Texas for vacation. It definitely wasn't New York, but I had a great time. It was enjoyable and relaxing. I will try to post pictures if I get a chance!

New York

Ok, so many of you may not know, but Karnell and I are planning a trip to go to New York. We have some friends that live in Jersey that we will be staying with, so we don't have to pay for a hotel. Karnell and I are super pumped. We haven't been on an official vacation since our honeymoon, almost 4 years ago!

I'm just couldn't wait to see Ground Zero, the Statue of Liberty, Times Square, Central Park, Lion King on Broadway, China Town, Little Italy; I could go on and on!

Karnell and I were able to take this wonderful vacation because of some workman's comp money he is getting from a burn on his arm. So this is a "not out of our pocket" vacation! Those are the best kind!

Well, all of our hopes and dreams came to a screeching hault as of yesterday. Yesterday I remembered that I needed to get the tags renewed on my car. No biggie, all I needed were tax receipts from 2007 and 2008, and a current inspection. So I went online to pull up the receipts to find that I DIDN'T PAY THEM FOR BOTH YEARS!!!! Can you believe that?! I definitely had an "I'm not a grown up yet" moment. I thought the taxes that you pay for your car payment was personal property taxes... well, no it's not... it's call SALES TAX... DUH! Not only that, but the taxes were in Kansas City... I didn't know you had to register your car when you move!

So when I first called the Kansas City people (that's the technical term) they told me I owed a GRAND!!! But I wasn't living in KC at the time, so I then got on the phone with the Springfield people (another technical term) and found out how much I really owed. Not quite a grand, it's a couple hundred less, but still... New York is in jeapordy!

So, the first thing I did, I cried! Then I pulled myself together and called Karnell. I knew he would be upset; but to be honest, he handled the intial shock quite well! When I went home I tried to think of things I could sell in order to get extra money... So far, I've sold a mirror. After work today, I'm gonna see if I can get some good money for some antique earrings.

I know that this seems a little crazy, but my life for the past 2 years has been crazy and very unstable, so I really need this vacation. Please pray that I find a way to get to New York! If nothing else at least pray that I do a little better at being an adult!

It's official!

My mommy and me!

The family!

The family again!


So I've been getting into "trouble" by not updating my blog. So here it is! These pictures were taken while my mom and brother Brian were here for a huge banquet for my job. Obviously, we took these pictures at Lamberts! Ok, so it's a short post, but it beats nothing!

Have a great day!

Way too much...

So... I've decided that I'm officially way too busy. My life picked up and ran... quick, fast and in a hurry! I don't even have time to blog. I love blogging so the mere fact that I don't get the chance saddens me. Well enough about being busy... I do have some thoughts on my mind.

Ok, so I've have been totally submerged around pregnant people. Whether it be my friends (which I have quite a few) that are pregnant, recently had babies, or starting their 2nd or 5th child; or at my job, where I'm faced with pregnancies all day long; I can't deny that it appears that everyone is having "baby fever".

So for the longest time I have convinced myself that I was TOTALLY not ready for children. But as time progresses, I start to see my dear close friends start to have children and I am starting to get more and more motivated.

I guess my question for the day is: am I one of those people that "won't" be able to get pregnant? Now, I'm sure you are curious as to why I'm asking that question. Here's why: Karnell and I have been married 3 1/2 years today, and we have in no way, shape, form, or fashion stopped a child from entering the world from the moment that we said "I do". So, in my head, I feel as though it's safe to at least question that as a possibility.

Also, I know that being pregnant and actually having the child is expensive... and Karnell and I are not ready to handle that type of responsibility. (If you want to know more about that... facebook me!) On the flip side of things, I do want a family and I don't want to be 35 years old when I do... so I guess, how do I get over this hump that I'm in... Any advice from those out there?